Insight

from Quarantine Blooms by rosey

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lyrics

I'm not worried about the people outside
I'm not worried about walking home
I'm not worried about you
I just want to leave alone

I can't even see with my own eyes
Lids nothing but dark on the inside
Protect me from something I despise
Take a breath, take a trip on my insight

Crash against my calves 'til I'm soft
Sedimentation builds atop of the slough
Take a hammer to it, chisel it 'til it opens
Pry it apart until the light shines through it
Break it 'til you see god

Put a stopper in it
Keep it soft and keep it secret
Never tell her that you mean it
'Cause you might start to believe
Keep it bundled, keep it hidden
Tell your daddy he's forgiven
Even though he never listens
Like he never let you leave

Wash away the layer of skin that he'd seen
Asystolic bath water rushing the drain
A masterpiece of raised flesh all over her body
The rest of it sat in a heap and rotting
Like the hole in your gut

The foolish dream of a child
You can't outrun it
Can't rise above what completely surrounds you
Can't you see it, you look just like her

I'm not worried about the people outside
I'm not worried about walking home
I'm not worried about you
I just want to leave alone

I can't even see through my own eyes
Lids nothing but dark on the inside
Protect me from something I despise
Take a breath, take a trip on my insight

Headache, down the middle, split both ways
No mess, haven't seen her out in days
Knock louder to see if she's okay
No answer, there's nothing left to say

credits

from Quarantine Blooms, released July 13, 2020

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rosey Memphis, Tennessee

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